The "3 Day Rule"

I had a discussion the other day with one of my guy friends about the 3 day rule of contacting a girl you recently met. Over the years, my girl friends have noticed that it usually takes about 3 days for someone to contact them.  My girlfriend thinks this is plain idiotic and knocks me in the head every time I mention this "3 day rule." But here are the reasons why this rule exists:

1. If you a playa, you can skip this. You know the game. 
2. Contacting a girl right away makes her think you are a bit desperate. 
3. Or you have nothing else going on in your life. 
4. It gives her imagination some room to dance.  What did you look like again? I wonder if I'll get a text? But I thought we flirted? etc
5. It prolongs the fun.

Okay, so here's my 2 cents on this rule:

1 cent: If you had a short flirty conversation and got her number then the rule is in play. The 3 is arbitrary. It can be 1 or 2 days but take your time. Remember, make it fun.

2 cents: If you really hit it off with a girl, it is no holds barred. You know, she knows, stop f*cking around.

I clearly made this 3 day rule up but it seems to exist in the dating realm. But like all rules, sometimes they are meant to be broken. (Unless the rules are Golden ;) )

Butch Mess of the Day

Below is the reason why I blog ladies and gentle ladies. Please advert the eyes of children, we don't want them growing up thinking this is okay:

I assume you answer to a father named Bubba and drive a tractor trailer Ms. Butch Mess.  Please incinerate that vest, now.

Chicago Pride Review

I am writing to you while still recovering from my awesome trip to Chi-town.  Before I start, I decided to come up with a rating system, the wet panty scale.

4 wet panties = All aspects of the city got me wet.
3 wet panties = Cool city, great people, will visit again.
2 wet panties = The meaning of the response people give you when they say "it was nice."
1 wet panty = Why pay when I can do it myself?

So here it goes...drum roll...I give Chicago 4 wet panties! with some assistance from the company of my girlfriend of course ;).  It was hard to soak up as much partying as I possibly could in the 36 hours that I was there. Partying on vacation is like packing, always have a plan. Here is what I packed in:

    1. Upon touch down I kicked off my Chicago Pride-a-thon with brunch
    2. Crashed the Chicago Pride Fest and threw back a few Budlights
    3. Hit up the popular Spin nightclub and got to meet the fabulous ladies of RuPaul's Drag Race, Mimi Imfurst and Ongina. She worked that stage like it was nobody's business. Move over Tyra, Ongina stuck her rainbow flag into Fierceville and she is not giving it back. 

    4. Woke up to pancakes and Mimosas as I prepared myself for an all day Pride celebration!  

I did Chicago Rockstar style, catching about 3 hours of sleep the whole time I was there. Which brings us to a sub-bullet of Golden Rule #2, Always Party Like a Rockstar.

Hope you enjoyed your Pride celebrations. Next stop, Toronto Pride!

Finally Marriage Equality in NY!

It's about time.  Many thanks to those who fought to make this happen :)

Looks like us butchies need to start saving for that ring.

Pride is in the Air - Time to Travel

Happy Pride!  I am packed and ready to hit up Chi-town.  This will be my second year attending Chicago Pride. I had a blast last year so my expectations are high.  Don't disappoint me Chicago.  Anyway, as I was packing, I thought a little session on packing 101 seemed appropriate. 

I like to look my best when traveling to another city because most likely your first impression will be your last impression and I want mine to sizzle in like branding a cow's ass.  Making an impression doesn't have to be difficult, you just have to choose your outfits wisely.  I decided to compile a list of the essential items I always bring with me.   

                1. Jeans - a dark pair to go out and a casual pair for the day

                2. V-neck white and black Ts.  (I like to show skin, so v-necks all the way)

                3. A tie - remember "burst of color"

                4. A button down shirt

                5. Blazer

                6. Pair of black canvas sneakers - comfortable and appropriate for the nightlife.

                7. A sparkly necklace - (A sparkle catches a girl's eye like moths to a flame)

                8. A pair of superstar shades 

Sounds boring? If you really think about it, I can create 10 outfits from just using the items above. It's all about accessorizing a simple outfit, hence the tie and necklace, but throw in other accessories you see fit.  Versatile items let you look good in the day and prepared to party at night.  Which brings me to Golden Rule #2, always be PTP (Prepared to Party)

Suit up!

There is a reason why Barney Stinson gets girls and it is not because of his adorable Neil Patrick Harris face.  It is because Girls Love Suits. It doesn't matter if they are straight, gay, bi, or alien, Girls Love Suits.  When possessed with suit goggles, a 2 becomes conversable, a 4 is now dateable , a 6 is sex on the first date, and a 10 is f*ck me in the bathroom NOW.  Okay, you get the point. Suit up!

The dos and don'ts of suiting up and I'll make this simple:

Do

Don't

Follow the golden rule, make it fitted or don't do it at all.  Adjustments I would make on the first pic (Ellen Page fyi) is to add what my girlfriend calls "a burst of color." I have to admit, when it comes to color, I'm the special kid in kindergarten who ate glue in the corner.  It is hard to coordinate color but it is very easy to add a burst of color to your outfit.  Instead of a black tie, I would have gone with something unexpected. Orange? Yellow? Pink? Or change the white handkerchief to something colorful.  

 

Embrace color.  It makes you more approachable and tells people you're fun and not just another suit.  

Bag or No Bag?

I stroll into the office today and my receptionist greeted me with, "Well look at you today, free and easy. No bag." Keyword: Free.  I hate carrying a bag. There are restrictions that come with it, but I'll expand on that later.  

I often bring a messenger bag with me to the office because a girl needs somewhere to put her sh*t.  It is a difficult task to find a good messenger bag for 2 reasons: 

                1. Straight girls don't carry messenger bags. They carry cute handbags i.e. NFTB (Not For The Butch) .

                2. When heading straight for the Men's accessories, I find messenger bags I can fit babies in. No. I want a nice, reasonable sized bag. 

So yes, I feel your pain.  It's a painful search but if you find the right one, trust me it's money well spent. 

Even with the perfect bag, I feel restricted, like it is weighing me down or preventing me from spontaneity.  If I decide to go to happy hour after work I have to worry about finding a table so I can put my bag somewhere or if I want to go party, where am I going to put my bag? I would need to dance near the area of my bag.  More importantly, a bag ruins my outfit. 

To reiterate, I hate carrying a bag but where do I put my stuff? For the winter, it is easy. I keep my things in a jacket or blazer (a must have in your wardrobe).  Summer is where it gets difficult.  I don't like to have things bulging out of my pockets.  I already get mistaken for being a guy, I don't need more assistance in that area.  I can't say I have figured out a solution for this problem but what I do is travel light.  On days where I don't carry a bag, I bring only what's necessary: keys (not janitor style; front door, apartment door, done) , ID, cash, and ONE credit card.  

How do you travel freely?

Hello World!

Welcome to LezQ.  Hopefully the purpose of this blog is inherent in the name.  If not, then I believe you came to the right place.  I've been to different cities, mostly along the east coast, and have noticed something unsettling in the Boi/Butch/Andro lesbian scene: absence of style.  Don't get me wrong, I am no fashion expert but I have eyes.  Occasionally they are assisted by a pair of black nerd frames or contact lenses (preferred), either way my vision is clear: oversized t-shirts served with a side of baggy jeans or baggy shorts with a white-tank (I know I know, it's a must have in the classic butch wardrobe but you won't stand out from the crowd).  

So here comes my first word of advice and it will be my Golden Rule: Fitted.  Fitted is the way to go. I'm not telling you to wear jeans so tight to the point of popping your ovaries, just not ones where you can stow bottles of 40s from the convenience store. Fitted is the way to go.

My ultimate goal here is to create a community of sexy butch lesbians even the straight girls will chase after and hopefully shatter some stereotypes along the way.  This blog will not only be about fashion but boi/butch lesbian style in general and whatever else wants to travel through my little fingers to make its way on here :)

LezQ